Saturday, August 14, 2010


I must admit, Motherhood bewilders me. You would think that after having had one baby (and numerous ultrasounds) that I would believe that there was actually a baby girl in my belly. But, to be honest, it's still a weird concept for me. Ok, so logically, I get it. And sure, there is definitely some tiny creature doing gymnastics in there. But really, truly, a baby girl... No way. It all seems so incredibly unreal.

I guess because there is a real disconnect between what my body is doing (H.F. is managing that job) and what I am doing... Donating "personal" space and raw materials for a good cause. It's obvious to me that I am not the one in charge of the project... Genetics, hormones, Heavenly Father... Ya. That's who's in charge here.

Me... I'm just doing my best to survive the experience without permanent damage. ;) (well, besides the usual, "your body will never, ever be the same" that goes along with every pregnancy.) I figure the best thing I can do to take care of her is to take care of myself. And get our life/ home ready (which is tough when you can't lift more than 10 lbs).

In the meantime, I just smile every time my little gymnast goes for another round of summersaults, knowing that she must be doing ok. So dearly excited that almost nothing else in this life matters... My family and my baby... That's all that matters.

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