Saturday, November 03, 2007

Ian's inner voice

Like most small children, Ian has no "inner voice" whatever he thinks comes out his mouth. For him this results in an endless stream of chatter that I find to be even slightly musical. I love to listen to him. It provides valuable information about what he's thinking about, what's important to him, and what he is actively trying to learn about.

Now days I hear more and more of my own voice and the voice of the adults in his world in his chatter. "Yea!", "Good job", "Hi Baby!", "No, no, no", "Oh my goodness", "Trash", "No way", "Thank you", "Excuse me", "Wifey", "Heavenly Father, Amen", "At home, at school, at play", "going to church. See momma may", "Mommy's ok?", "Going to Nini's house. See the kids" "Happy, Happy".

A well known Psychologist (erikson, I think, but I'm not sure) said that when a child is small, they don't have an inner voice. They use their outer voice to think through and understand the world, as they grow older, their outer voice shifts inward. It recently occured to me, if his outer voice echos me. So will his inner voice. That's right. The words I say. The words Dave says. The words the other adults in his world say to him will ultimately become his inner voice. The voice he will use to guide him through his life. Thus far I hear a happy kid who knows he's loved and know's how to love others and really likes trains and cars, likes church, and is really interested in Heavenly Father.

I still remember my mother's voice, "You are my pride and joy." She also believed I was smart and kind and really pretty. She reminded me to be modest, obey the word of wisdom of wisdom, and warned me against people that might try to put their hands where they don't belong. She taught me to find joy in service. Her words protected me against alot of pain in life.

It makes me realize how important it is to make sure the things I say are loving, kind, productive, and instructive. I've always believed that children become what you believe they are. Now I understand why.